Mister Toad's Wild Ride

Hammers and Nails

2008-01-24T15:22:00.000-08:00

"When the only tool you have is a hammer,everything looks like a nail..."~ PhishGreetings, Imaginary Readers, where ever you might be...I haven't written in here in a long, long time but I want to start again so off we go!See, I've been in a weird place lately. It's not a very good place so this is hopefully the start of my journey out of it.This won't be a post about my medical troubles.. most

Go Chargers!

2008-01-15T14:43:00.000-08:00

Well, here I am once more in Beautiful Hollywood, CA. for the 2nd time this year to have my head zapped by the big Novalis machine. I'm in a cybercafe right on Hollywood Blvd. - Fun, if you like people watching like I do. This time, I'm here for just one little .5mm met recently found in my left temporal lobe. That should be a snap but the rad. onc. in charge did warn me that sometimes they

2007-12-10T11:18:00.000-08:00

Cancer sucks!I have to admit, things are getting a little scary for me again.For the first time, today one of my docs referred to the nodule in my back as a met, unhesitatingly, as if there were never any question. Up till now, my other docs were all saying that the scans were inconclusive but this doc didn't seem to have much doubt.I'll be getting a bone scan in the next few week which will

Understand

2007-11-16T14:36:00.000-08:00

You've been talkin' back and forth in rhymes, you don't listenDoesn't matter what I say On your way...Gone One too many days You've been walkin' back and forth it's time that your missin' Gets more pathetic every day On your way...Gone One too many days Yeah I'll rue the day, when the day would come to you, wonder who's that man? You look at you and notice that you and me have the

New mets :(

2007-11-14T10:37:00.001-08:00

[From my recent "List" post]--snip--Hi folks.. I just got some news. My neurologist just called me with my recent MRI results and the results are good and not-so-good. The good news is that my previous radiation treatments have resulted in significant shrinkage of my remaining brain mets (The ones that popped up after my first SRS (Novalis - similar to Gamma Knife) ) So it appears that the

Witch Fire

2007-10-24T11:22:00.000-07:00

"Look at the sky turn a hell fire redSomebody's house is burnin' down down, down downDown, down, down."~ HendrixSo once again, as in Oct. of 2003 (IIRC) it seems like the entire world is burning down here in San Diego. Right now, after burning for 4 days now, the fires are in a horseshoe pattern with us in the middle. I think we'll be ok though as the Santa Ana winds are easing up some. We just

What color is God?

2007-10-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

"Why can't you tell me, can't you tell me? What colour is god?"~ FishWatching the News always makes me wonder about this world we live in.Why do so many people object to the word "God"? Especially when associated with the United States?I should tell you that I am not a religious person, though I'm not quite an atheist either. But I just read a story about a man that requested that a U.S. flag

Got Mule?

2007-09-18T10:16:00.000-07:00

"It's been a long time since I rock and rolled, It's been a long time since I did the Stroll..."~ Led ZeppelinIf anyone still bothers to look in here, I apologize for my long absence.I've just not had much to say. Or, I have plenty to say but have lacked the gumption (I love that word) to get in here and write anything.I've been taking a cancer drug

Just a quicky...

2007-07-18T11:53:00.000-07:00

Just a quick and dirty cut -n- paste job from my Kidney-Onc List post to keep the ol' blog up to date...--snip--Hi folks, Well, I just read through the report from my most recent MRI of my noggin. There's some bad news but some good news as well.. Bad news first... The right Cerebral frontal lesion shows a "very slight" increase in size. That's the bad news. Not too bad though, eh? Especially

Lazy damn doctors...

2007-07-18T08:01:00.000-07:00

In about 1 hour, I'm driving down to Kaiser to get the written part of my MRI report. Scanxiety is at an all time high.Apparently, Kaiser are just too busy to be bothered by having call and give their opinions so I have to go get the report myself and hope I can make some sense of it. As it stands right now, I don't even have any appointments set up with ant of my onc, docs.Hey, maybe that means

The Mask

2007-07-17T14:11:00.000-07:00

"Pay me, I'll be your surgeonI'd like to pick your brain..."~ Blue Oyster CultSo here are some pics of the mask that was used for my Whole Brain Radiation treatments. The mask used for the earlier targeted SRS (Novalis) treatments was very similar only much tighter and more uncomfortable.Either one beat the hell out of the older method which involved a "halo-like" device which they apparently

MRI day

2007-07-11T07:51:00.000-07:00

"Well I bumped inside the magic manAnd he layed some tricks for meHe said, "You do need help my friend"I whispered, "obviously"He laid a spread of Jacks and QueensAnd he bade me take my pickBut every face had your faceI cried out, "I am sick..." " ~ D. Roeser - P. Smith (Blue Oyster Cult)Today is a big day for me. In about 45 minutes, I'm off to Kaiser for what may prove to be a crucial MRI scan

I don't need no doctor...

2007-07-05T11:41:00.000-07:00

"I don`t need no doctorMy prescription tells me thatI don`t need no doctorI don`t need no doctorAll I need is my babyYou don`t know I`m in miseryI don`t need no doctorI don`t need no doctorWell, the doctor said I need restHe put me on the critical listKeeping me safe from harmAll I need is her sweet charmHe gave me a medicated lotionIt wouldn`t do, woah yeahMy emotion, oh yeahI don`t need no

Panic attack!

2007-07-03T10:57:00.000-07:00

"Climb to safetyAfter all that I've been through, you're the only one that mattersClimb to safetyYou never left me in the dark here on my ownClimb to safetyFeel the water rising. Let me be your ladderClimb to safetyI promise you'll be dry and never be alone You call me on the phone, you say that it is crucialYou stick your fingers in your ears 'til they explodeI guess the business will be goin'

Can't get high...

2007-06-27T07:36:00.000-07:00

"Violent romanticOn a seven day bingeLosin' a gambleBut I get my revengeStart thinking about thunderAnd I get mad againSoaking up electricityLike bourbon and ginNow that you're goneI'm sober every nightI can't get high - no -I can't get right"~ Widespread PanicCoffee shop day...I think I've finally turned the corner as far as this week's steroid dose reduction.. Now down to just 1mg. am and 1 mg.

2007-06-21T07:37:00.000-07:00

"Consideration for your fellow man Would not hurt anybody, it sure fits in with my plan Over the border, there lies the promised land Where everything comes easy, you just hold out your hand "Keep your suspicions, I've seen that look before But I ain't done nothing wrong now, is that such a suprise But I've got a sister who'd be willing to oblige She will do anything now to help me get to the

For your amusement...

2007-06-20T08:50:00.000-07:00

"I looked in the mirror todayMy eyes just didn't seem so brightI've lost a few more hairsI think I'm going baldI think I'm going baldSeems like only yesterdayWe would sit and talk of dreams all nightDreams of youthAnd simple truthsNow we're so involvedSo involved with lifeWalk down vanity fairMemory lane everywhereWall Street shuffles thereDressed in flowing hairOnce we loved the flowersNow we

Still alive & Well... (every now and then I know it's kinda hard to tell...)

2007-06-15T10:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I haven't posted here in a while and I imagine that the legions of adoring Wild Ride readers are clammoring mightily by now... (cough) [sound of crickets]Today is my last day of Whole Brain Radiation Therapy (WBRT). I hope it has done me some good but have to admit that I don't have a lot of confidence in it. Most literature I've been able to dig up seems to suggest that it (WBRT) is just

Rock and Roll ain't noise pollution...

2007-06-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

"If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung Would you hear my voice come through the music Would you hold it near as it were your own? It's a hand-me-down, the thoughts are broken Perhaps they're better left unsung I don't know, don't really care Let there be songs to fill the air"~ HunterI love rock lyrics, don't you?Sure, a lot of

Is there anybody out there?

2007-05-31T14:23:00.000-07:00

So how do you like the new layout so far? It's not much but I'll continue tweaking it as I go along.The picture up top is of my desktop here at CroakerJoe central, in case you're wondering.Does anyone actually read this thing or am I just blabbing to myself? Comments are definitely encouraged :)Maybe I should say something outrageous and see if anyone bites?In other news.. I begin my Whole Brain

Messy Boy

2007-05-29T10:24:00.000-07:00

"I've been uptight and made a mess But I'll clean it up myself, I guess Oh, the sweet smell of success Handle me with care"